O.K. Men. It’s High Time We Talked

“I Wanted A Monster” – Man With Ten Inch Penis Gets a Penoplasty Enlargement

“To which Billy-Tom explained:’ A lot of girls think so. On two occasions I have got to the point where they’ve seen it and they’ve refused me…they just point blank said they’re not willing to go any further with that. But most other girls absolutely loved it”

Men, guys, sorry to burst your bubble, but women only say that because you guys are *so* desperate to hear it. I can just imagine this guy whipping off his pants and posing, looking at his dick, then at the girl, then at his dick again, then at the girl with this “Yeah, that’s right. It’s huge. It’s awesome, so I’m awesome. C’mon. Say it Baby. You know you want to. I’m breathtaking. I’m the biggest man you’ve ever seen. I am so impressive. Say it!….please? I’m begging you” look on his face.

That’s right. We know how much stock you put in your stalk, so to make you happy, we agree with you that size matters and praise it, no matter what size it is. O.k.? It a slightly more extreme version of your “No honey, you look amazing” when we ask you if we look fat. If you feel the desire to have someone take a scalpel to such a delicate piece of equipment to make it bigger (and possibly lose nerve sensation), that’s on you for you. (And if you are *that* insecure, maybe you should talk to a shrink first.) Don’t use us an excuse.

Let me tell you why:

When we are not aroused, the human female vagina is only three inches deep. When we are aroused, it’s only five inches deep. There are no tactile/texture nerves in most of it. Those are concentrated at the entrance. At the back there are no pleasure buttons. It’s just a wall and the cervix, neither of which are erogenous and are attached to non-arousing things in our abdomen, so it *hurts* if there is too much pressure. Knocking against the cervix is not “Oooh, baby, you’re so big!” It’s “OW!” But that is usually just an angle issue. Yes, the vagina can stretch to accommodate, but that does not mean it is pleasurable or even comfortable.

(The G-Spot is NOT at the back. It’s on the top/belly side, an inch or two behind the entrance.)

So unless you are dating a girl with the Grand Canyon down there, length does not matter.

Physically, the structure and nerves of the clitoris are not just the little button at the top of our pussys. Inside the body there are two arms or wings (however you want to describe them) that descend from what you see outside to surround the entrance of the vagina inside. When we’re aroused, they swell too and become sensitive to pressure while the tactile nerves in surface there respond to the touch of your penis as it  moves though our vulva. So straight-up physically, it’s about width, not length. So Bob the Barrell Prick is the one physically equipped to please the ladies. Though there is a point where that maxes out too and it’s too thick to be comfortable.

But having the right tool is not what gets our engines running. Your wonderwand will not do the work for you.

Let me tell you what really matters: Intimacy. Trust. Caring. Effort. A good sense of humor and a lack of inhibition.

It matters the most that both (or all) parties feel safe so that they can relax and let go to do and ask for what they really want, to be open and listen to what their partner(s) really wants, to openly share the pleasure and fun of that experience.

Here is the dirty little secret about sex: It’s never meaningless. For someone to get naked and be that vulnerable with another human being, there are emotions and some level of intimacy involved. Yes even for men. Given how sensitive and vulnerable you all are about your cocks (and I know there is more to you than that, but that is the most obvious example), there has to be a level of trust you are walking into that bedroom (or bathroom, or living room, or kitchen, or backseat, or elevator or wherever) with. If there is not, if someone can remain *that* detached that they can’t connect with someone while they are having sex, there is something wrong with them. I’m not condemning one night stands, I’m just saying there is no such thing as sex without some level emotional involvement because that is the only way you trust someone enough to have that kind of fun.

Another thing to avoid is getting one’s ego wrapped up in one’s sexual being as this guy obviously has. And I’ve seen that in both men and women. Let me tell you what happens when someone puts all this unrelated baggage on their sexual being: It stops being fun. People who do that stop being fun. There is too much pressure on sex for it to be truly fun for them. They are so tense about living up to their hype that they can’t relax and enjoy themselves. Trust me, I have seen it and talked to people who slept them. Despite the overt sexuality in public, the terms “mechanical” and  “lying there like a dead fish” come up frequently. Sex is not a performance, it’s an experience.

So you can be hung like a tree branch, but if you and your partner(s) can’t relax, trust and let go, it’s going to be about as exciting as watching paint dry. Men at least get the masturbatory experience, but for us on the receiving end, we’re making out our grocery lists.

I’m not going to claim sex is about sharing your souls in a Calgon commercial with “earth-shattering” orgasms. Though yes, those times will come, but when they do, they are a surprise, happening naturally out of the moment. You can’t manufacture them. (Which is an idea a lot of women have a hard time coming to grips with.)  Most sex is just (I say “just,” but it’s a wonderful thing) about sharing yourself with someone and having a hella good time doing so.

So freakin’ relax already! If she or he is willingly taking her or his clothes off with you, you have already impressed her or him. You can have only four inches down there and if you have the right attitude, some skill and take your time, you will be that mysterious smile on her or his face for the next week or more. And you won’t be crying into your beer either.

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6 thoughts on “O.K. Men. It’s High Time We Talked

  1. Well said! This line especially hit me, I’ve never considered it, but you’re right!
    “If she or he is willingly taking her or his clothes off with you, you have already impressed her or him.”
    It is a little sad, to get caught in the details and miss the experience. Shame, that. Hi, Caty!

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